I Need to Apologize (Explicit)

[Col. R. Hogan]

"Colonel Klink! Wait, come back!"
*sighs*
"Fuck, I can't even blame him for being furious. How could I do this to someone I love?"
*wishes he had an answer to that question*
*scrubs at his face*
*feels very world-weary all of a sudden*
*doesn't want Klink to get lost in the woods*
*has no clue if he even knows where he's going*
*decides to follow behind Klink, but at a decent distance so he can have his space*
*doesn't want his kommandant to get hurt just because he stomped off in a rage*
*briefly ponders when he started thinking of Klink as 'his'*
*locks the car*
*puts the keys in the pocket of his leather coat*
*begins trailing behind Klink*

[Oberst W. Klink]

*the further he walks the more his anger fades making way for relief and exhaustion and still the feeling of betrayal*
*even if they weren't a good fit as a couple, Hogan was still the person closest to him in this world*
*but apparently their friendship meant nothing to Hogan and he was ready to sacrifice Klinks life or at least his sanity on a whim*
*slows down as exhaustion takes over*
*he wishes he was home and could just lie down in his bed and never ever see anyone again*
*finally sits down on fallen tree to rest*
*as soon as he stops moving all the stress he lived through today overwhelms him and the tears start falling*
*pulls his coat tighter aroudn his trembling shoulders and sobs*
*it feels like a relief*

[Col. R. Hogan]

*keeps his distance while he follows Klink*
*also keeps track of what direction they're currently headed in so he knows how to get back to the car*
*stops the moment Klink does*
*feels his heart break when Klink initially begins crying*
*feels super awkward because it's like he's intruding on a personal moment*
*wants to leave and give him some privacy*
*but is afraid Klink might decide to keep walking and get lost*
*remembers he's of the Junker aristocracy*
*has no idea if nobles ever went camping*
*or know anything about the wilderness*
*is unwilling to risk it either way*
*and not just because he'd have a hell of a time explaining how that happened either*
*nobody - not even Schultz - is going to believe a POW accidentally lost their Kommandant in the woods*
*that would be the exact opposite of German efficiency*
*plus there is no lost and found for prison camp Kommandanten*
*doesn’t have to worry about the whole situation for very long before he starts crying too*
*is royally pissed at himself for being such an insensitive asshole*
*wants to give Klink a hug after the sobs start*
*remembers Klink said he never wants to see his face again*
*has a solution to that*
*first shrugs off his leather jacket, shivering the moment the cold hits him*
*drapes it over his arm*
*pulls the brim of his hat down so it covers his face*
*walks quietly up to Klink from behind*
*drapes the leather jacket over his trembling shoulders so Klink won't be cold*
*mouths "I love you"*
*turns and starts to walk away, hot tears still streaming down his covered face*
*has left the car keys in the pocket on purpose so Klink can get back to his camp*

[Oberst W. Klink]

*feels a lot better after he lets the tears fall as the stress falls with them and the sobs take the tightness from his chest*
*flinches as he feels the heavy leather coat on his shoulders and Hogan's choked whisper*
*he hadn't heard Hogan approach*
*jumps up wiping at his face feeling ashamed to be seen crying*
*wants to yell at Hogan to fuck off but sees him already walk away like a beaten dog*
*sighs and wipes the rest of the tears away angrily*
*can't that Dummkopf take care of himself for five minutes to give him a break?!*
*watches him walk away with clenched fists and gritted teeth unsure of waht he should do, because he really wants to let that fucker freeze*
*he had just felt so relieved alone in the forest and now that idiot was taking that away again in under 10 minutes*
*angrily shrugs the leather coat from his shoulders and takes it in hand then stomps after Hogan*
*when he catches up he shoves the coat at Hogan*
Verdammt nochmal Hogan! Du holst dir den Tod!
Put on your coat, Dummkopf!!
*as soon as he got rid of the coat he brings some distance between them again*
And now come on!
I can't drive with the amount of Schnaps I had!
I'm surprised I can walk ... *murmurs*
*angrily stomps towards the car*
*he knows exactly where he is bc it's not that hard to keep orientation in a german forest*
*when he reaches the car he gets into the back seat again*
*no way is he going to sit next to that Arschloch*

[Col. R. Hogan]

*doesn't have a chance to tell Klink to keep it before it's shoved at him*
*puts the coat back on with no protests so as not to further anger Klink*
*hears the schnapps comment*
*wonders what the odds are of giving Klink some bread - if he can find any - to eat without having it thrown back at him*
*also wonders if Klink has eaten anything since Hochstetter first showed up*
*he doubts it*
*gets in the driver's seat*
*closes the door*
*removes the coat again and tosses it in the backseat*
*that way Klink can use it like a blanket if he wants to* 
*sits there in silence, trying to compose himself*
*is finding that difficult when everything is hitting him all at once*
*the only sounds he's making are the shudder-y ones people make while sobbing*
*is only half-succeeding at suppressing them*
*but still doing his best to hide the fact he's actively crying*

[Oberst W. Klink]

*sits in the back and tries to ignore Hogan*
*is angry because it's hard to hate Hogan when he's obviously crying*
*feels blackmailed by this*
Could you pull yourself together?!
I don't want to sit here all night!
*throws the coat back to the front putting all his anger into the throw*
And put that damned coat back on!!
*is so angry at the unfairness of this behaviour. He's not the one who should be taking care of Hogan right now and he absolutely doesn't want to but that stupid overgrown boy who - somehow! SOMEHOW! - made full Colonel - which is also so infuriatingly unfair- , doesn't really leave him a choice*
*was it so much to ask for some peace and quiet to recover from...*
*feels sick again when he thinks about the last 12 or so hours*
*best not to think about that at all, maybe ever again...*
*really just wants to go crawl under his covers and be left alone until he can properly deal with all of it*
*if that Dummkopf doesn't drive within the next minute he'll just do it himself, Schnaps hin oder her*

[Col. R. Hogan]

"Wha, what do you think I'm trying to do here?!?"
*instantly regrets his harsh tone*
*slumps his shoulders*
"I'm...I'm sorry. Didn’t mean to snap at you like that, not when you're right to be furious with me." 
*wipes away the last of his tears*
*resolves to have his breakdown in his quarters later on so he can keep his act together in front of everyone else*
*really doesn't want his men trying to lynch Klink for hurting him when the kommandant didn’t do anything wrong*
*but he did and he knows it*
*tosses the coat back in the backseat*
"I'm not cold. Maybe you can use it as a blanket or something."
*body chooses that moment to shiver a little*
"Even if I was, it's my job to worry about you, not the other way around."
*starts the car*
*begins driving in the general direction of the Hofbräuhaus*
*wonders how he's gonna convince Klink to eat something*
*decides to try the direct approach instead of a plan, seeing as his last plan epically failed*
*cautious tone*
"Would it be alright if I bought you something to eat? The food might soak up the schnapps and help you feel better..."

[Oberst W. Klink]

Verflucht Hogan!!
*yells*
do you absolutely have to insist on disregarding your health?!
put on that damned coat, das ist ein Befehl!
*throws the coat back at him*
*it's true that he was and is cold but no coat in the world could do anything against that and besides, the anger starts to warm him up quiete a little now*
I'm feeling fine!
Contrary to your beliefs I can handle my drinks just fine!
I don't need your help!
I don't want food i want to go ho- back to camp! Now!

[Col. R. Hogan]

*speaks in a calm voice*
"Yes, actually. It's my way of working through how guilty I currently feel. Otherwise, I might do something more drastic instead."
*pulls over*
*quickly puts on the coat*
*begins driving again*
*keeps his voice calm*
*doesn't point out how Klink himself had said he was suprised he could walk after all the schnapps he'd had earlier*
"I wasn’t saying you couldn't handle them, sir. But I didn’t think you'd want a hangover either. I meant no offense."
*thinks Klink must be nuts if he does*
*doesn't mention the near slip of the tongue either because he doesn't want to start another war*
*can barely handle the two he's currently part of*
"Of course, Kommandant. I've gotta go pick up my friend at the Hofbräuhaus house first, though. I promised him I would when we dropped him off earlier. But then it's straight back to Stalag 13."

[Oberst W. Klink]

*Hogan is damned right to be sorry!*
*but still he wishes Hogan would take better care of himself*
*also he doesn't want to see him suffer*
*sighs in frustration*
*here he goes again unable to stay mad at Hogan*
*at least the Arschloch put on his coat...*
*leans back and closes his eyes at the small victory*
*slowly the side effects of the cognac start to creep up on him making him sick and his head spin*
*doesnt listen to Hogan's assertions, he couldn't care less*
*instead leans his head against the sidewall of the car again trying to get comfortable*
*quickly falls asleep as exhaustion takes over*

[Col. R. Hogan]

- An hour later -

*has picked up Carter*
*and dropped him off with the food as close as he safely get to their tunnel*
*is debating if telling his team that Klink knew about the operation  - and didn't try to sell him out to Hochstetter - would make them any less hostile towards Klink*
*especially when he's the one who caused all of this*
*stomach twists again at that knowledge*
*drives into the camp*
*rolls to a stop in front of Klink’s quarters*
*turns off the car*
*really doesn't want to disturb Klink because he's sleeping so peacefully*
*but wonders how in the hell he's supposed to get Klink out of the car then*
*thinks for a moment or two before sighing*
*he would carry Klink inside, but he doesn't want to humiliate him*
*Hochstetter already did enough of that for one day*
*also figures Klink would resist him*
*which would result in being dropped on accident*
*turns around instead*
*gently shakes Klink awake*
"We're back at your camp, Kommandant."
*didn't emphasize it, but said 'your' instead of 'the' on purpose*

[Oberst W. Klink]

*slowly blinks awake*
*Sees Hogan's familiar face lokking back at him*
*And the well-known surroundings of his camp*
*Is so relieved he could cry again*
*Opens the car door*
*But as soon as he moves his head spins and he feels terribly sick*
*Groans*
*His head is so heavy he doesn't know how he's supposed to hold it upright*
*Hangs between door and seat trying not to throw up*
*Not that there would be anything inside his stomach to throw up*
*Damned hangovers!*
*Just hangs there and waits for the sickness to go away so he can get out*

[Col. R. Hogan]

*scrambles out of the car*
*wants to get Klink inside, out of the cold*
*and get out of this cursed uniform too*
*is thankful Klink’s guards either haven't noticed where he's at or are too afraid to approach an SS general*
*but that doesn't mean he has time to lollygag*
*helps Klink slowly get to his feet and walk inside his quarters*
*steers him toward his room*

[Oberst W. Klink]

*leans heavily on Hogan*
*lets him help him up the stairs and is thankful for that as the spinning of the world around him makes it hard to find the steps*
*the warmth of hogans body feels good next to him*
*while he remembers that he rightfully hates Hogan the longing for some warm human touch is stronger right now so he leans in closer*
*really wishes Hogan had just told him that he was going to save him, then he wouldn't need to hate him and could just let Hogan hold him*
**lets Hogan set him down on his bed and tiredly watches him remove his boots*
*he really doesn't get how Hogan could put him through all of this without giving a single shit but now seems to care so much again*
*what is wrong with him?!*
*thinks about whether he should ask*
*didn't Hogan say he wanted to explain?*
*but what is there to explain?!*
*he would damn well have been very afraid of Hochstetter even if Hogan had told him that he was going to save him!!*
*there is no excuse for letting him believe that he was going to be tortured!*
*anger rises up again and he decides not to grace Hogan by talking to him*

[Col. R. Hogan]

*is happy when Klink leans in closer than necessary*
*but doesn't show it lest he ruin things with his big mouth*
*fetches a glass of water and some aspirin after removing Klink's boots*
*sets them on Klink's nightstand so he'll see both items once he's ready to go looking for them*
*gently removes the monocle so it doesn't get broken*
*sets it on the nightstand too*
*is helping since he knows what it's like to be hungover*
*and because he still loves his kommandant, even if Klink hates him now*
*alcohol always hits him really hard*
*wonders if it's because he doesn't drink that often, the strength of the alcohol, or both*
*whispers*
"Is there anything else I can do for you, sir?"

[Oberst W. Klink]

*fumbles out of his coat and tie while Hogan left the room*
*just lets them fall to the floor*
*is thankful for the glass of water, finally a good idea, he' ll definitely need it*
*wants to dodge Hogans hand when he reaches for the monocle but moving his head fast was a really dumb idea and sets the world into fast spin again*
*shudders and lets himself fall onto the pillows*
*pulls his feet up and has to hold on to the bed in order to not fall of the edge of the world*
*he definitely will keep away from Cognac for a while*
*when Hogan asks if there's anything else he manages to roll onto his other side to turn his back on Hogan*
Get out!

[Col. R. Hogan]

*refrains from trying to give Klink a hug*
*doesn't think it would be appreciated at the moment*
*nods his head*
*whispers again*
"Schlaf gut, then. Maybe we can talk in a few days."
*silently exits the building*

[Oberst W. Klink]

Schultz:
*waits in a safe distance until the ominous SS-General has left Klink's quarters then hurries inside*
*knocks on Klink's bedroom*
*is very relieved as he hears an angry "what?!" from inside and enters*
Herr Kommandant!! *happy*
you're alive! *beams*
What happened?! who was that Brigadeführer?

[Oberst W. Klink]

*after the world has slowed down it's spinning he has drunk the glass of water and taken the Aspirin*
*sits on the edge of his bed as it knocks*
*is relievd it is only Schultz who comes inside*
*and for once he is truly happy to see his Feldwebel*
Schultz!
*frowns as Schultz asks him questions*
Schultz! Shut up!
help me out of this uniform and then get me another glass of water!
*sounds as stern and annoyed as usual but then a smile creeps onto his face*
*how good to be home!*

[Oberst W. Klink]

Schultz:
*wasn't able to get anything out of his Kommandant but is happy enough that something must have worked out in his favor*
*exits Klink's quarter's and is relieved to see the Brigadeführer's staff car gone*
*he's really not keen to talk to any SS-officer*
*but when he is down the stairs and wnats to head for the guard's quarters he sees the Brigadeführer aproach him from the direction of the motorpool*
Jesses...! *rolls his eyes and makes the sign of the cross*
*then salutes and stands at attention when the man comes closer*
Herr Brigadeführer!